Jeez, Could I Be More Wretched?!

Hello world and hello Philippines! The time now is 07:07 am, and I sit here feeling such a loser!!!! (S&*^! *&^$! %$#@! ^%$#!) Sorry about that. It's just that bad luck seemed to have been embracing me last night.

However nervous I was, there's this excitement I felt with the surgical procedure to be perfomed last night. It was an AP (Appendectomy) case, and it was NOT just an AP. The patient was for Exploratory Laparotomy or x-lap. (You know, they sort of clean everything up in the abdomen when the inflamed appendix has ruptured, and the surgeons check for any other significant problems). This kind of procedure lasts for AT LEAST three hours.

It wasn't just about the case that I'll be able to get, but the involvement itself. I've only been on a Caesarian section, Appendectomy, Herniorrhaphy and some other minor surgeries, and X-lap is SOMETHING else.

We were already inside the O.R at 8pm. We've made the necessary preparations-- the instruments on the back table, the mayo table, the O.R bed, and the--well, world-class anesthesia machine they've said (first and only one in the Philippines).

11.30 pm, and all the doctors were assembled already. The Surgeon, Dr. Baquiano, the Anaesthesiologist, Dr. Vizcayno, and the assistant surgeon whom I wasn't able to be acquainted with were present in the OR premises.

Dr. Baquiano got inside and assessed the patient. The classic physical assessment they always do with that kind of case--palpation. Fortunately, (for the patient, and unfortunate for someone who needs the case, that would be me) there was a change in his ( the patient's) condition. His abdomen shifted from board-like to soft. Moreover, the pain he was feeling was on the upper right abdomen, which could suggest a liver problem. He also felt this somewhere on his back, which also suggests a kidney problem. Thus, Dr. Baquiano decided to defer the procedure, and requested for UTZ (ultrasound). This is to further assess the priority problem of the patient, and be able to be certain where to approach best when he starts the procedure.

Oh well, I guess it wasn't just my day. Jinx was in every corner of that room. What more can I do? It's already decided. It just feels really frustrating. bah! Off to sleep now, 16 frickin' hours is driving me nuts.

Sunday Syndrome

All the friends are out, tedious TV shows, and humdrum songs on the radio. Man, the whole crap about Sunday is giving me a headache. Darn!

There's certainly nothing to do around here, and even if there is, the day has a boring feel to it.

I even just scribbled down my narrative report without editing anything.

 Well I couldn't really drown myself into it now, hence, I try to alleviate everything, by playing music from Destiny's Child's discography. The songs IF, T-SHIRT, LOVE, GIRL, and my all-time favorites CATER TO YOU and BROWN EYES. The first three aren't really known but I digg them.

If you listen to all of them, you wouldn't agree with me when I said I will "alleviate" the dull mood of the day, but hey, this is me. I've got some memories of those. They're more of like back in my Dark Ages if you know what I mean.

There's this awe of warmth and a distinct feel of bliss seeing how much you've grown from those old days. Plus, you don't feel any regret and certainly just over the feeling-so-bad stage. 

here's one of the songs I was tellin' you of: enjoy.... 

Cater to You - Destiny Child

This is Fun!

This is one of my two favorite Korean movies. The other one (My Little Bride) also starred the leading lady in this movie, Innocent Steps.

I really love dance sports more than hip-hop and pop dance. Hmm... Oh boy, I really wish I could do that too.

Enjoy the vid. :-)

A Secret Disclosed

It was around 9 in the evening, and I was in front of the computer, when suddenly, I felt weird all over. I noticed that there were rashes on both of my arms. There I realized the impending, yet another allergy attack.

Since I'm quite used to it (because I had it for almost seven years already), I know just what to do. I immediately went to my room, and took two tablets of my medicine (Diphenhydramine). But, unfortunately, it wasn't like any other mild allergic reactions. I can classify it as one of my moderate-severe (allergy) attacks. In fact, it's a really distinct one. It took up on me in a very rapid manner. A thing that never ocurred before. (It usually breaks out after an hour or so). 

My face was flushed all over, and I can feel the heat inside me. My heart was beating so fast, and in a very stalwart manner that it radiates up on my face, and my back. (This is due to the dilatation of the blood vessels which increases the blood volume entering the heart. Thus, to compensate, the heart needs to work double-time). 

At that particular instant, I knew that the drug I took isn't enough to control the situation.

Without wasting any second more (Of course, I wont wait 'til my face bulges), I went to the nearest hospital.

When I arrived at the ER (Emergency Room), I felt inexplicably weak, as if I'm going to faint anytime soon. It was the very first time I ever said "pakibilisan, hindi ko na kaya.

The nurse hurriedly aspirated the solution on the ampule, and gave me a shot of a strong anti-histamine drug. (Aw! That was f*n' painful! lols. For a soon-to-be nurse, I'm a fraidy-cat when it comes to needles. susshhh...)

But, at that moment of my suffering, I just couldn't care less. All I know is that I want to go home and go to bed. I know that the medication given to me will put me to sleep. (A deep sleep, specifically)

So, you want to know how it feels? Well, simple as it is. After several minutes, I feel my extremities go mildly numb, or heavy, as if it's already asleep. Then, I feel really drowsy the following minutes.(And I just can't help it!)

Afterwards,slowly...slowly...slowly....one...two...three..four...f.... and my eyes were shut. 

I go through this everytime I'm in a moderate-severe case of my attacks.

When I wake up the following day, I feel really light (like I'm floating). It (the feeling) doesn't  last though, just the first couple of minutes when I get up.

Just so you know, I really don't like talking about this. That's why you may notice that I only give little details about it. I'll give you two good reasons. First, some may be grossed out. Second, what really happens to me is a bit personal. Not unless you've witnessed me having an allergy attack. Then I couldn't hide it now, could I? (laughs)

Maybe now you wonder why I wrote this even if I'm a bit privy about it. Tell you what, I'll give you one EXCELLENT reason: Because, to those who says "ang arte mo naman!", you don't know how much I want to choke you when you say that! 

Some people just don't get it. It's not being "maarte" or being "rich". It's about being HYPERSENSITIVE to some f*n' stuffs and you CAN'T do anything about it! They don't know how people with this kind of sickness deals with it everyday of their lives. You have to give up some things, in order to avoid triggering the condition. 

As for myself, it's been a part of my life to bring along with me different kinds of medication for it. It's like my lifesaver. Apart from that, I stay away from seafoods. (specifically, crab and shrimp).

There are other stuffs which triggers my ailment, but there's really no need for you to know.

My only point here is that, if you're with someone who has the same case as mine, try to be sensitive. (Because, I tell you, they are hypersensitive to your negative comments as well. And we know that there's no medication for that).

I'm just glad that I have my family and some real good friends who understand my condition, and they're all pretty much concerned about it. Maybe it's time for you to be one of them. 

elf_archer09 =)